On Acceptance & and time travel. . . but not necessarily in that order

samtosad anuttamah sukhalabhah -Yoga Sutras 2:42

“From contentment, unsurpassed happiness is obtained.”

Did you know that time travel is real? That at any given moment you can project yourself to the past or future? Well it’s true. We time travel all the time. Any time you start ruminating on a mistake you made three years ago, you time travel. Your mind goes back to that space, and as a result, your body follows you there. Maybe you start to feel feelings of shame, or regret. Maybe you become so engrossed in this memory that you start to get physically upset, crying, or become so distracted you can’t carry on with the task at hand.  Similarly, when we begin to worry and imagine about things that could go wrong in the future, our body follows us there as well.  Maybe you are thinking about a big presentation at work, and gradually start to get butterflies in your stomach, and your body becomes flushed with adrenaline. You start to worry about how your presentation will be received, what exactly you will say, what you will wear. . .Suddenly, you are in the future. . .

escalated quickly

With the practice of yoga and meditation, we work to train our minds to stay in the present. How? Well, it’s very difficult to focus on anything other than the present moment when you’re standing on one leg! In fact, the practice of yoga requires concentration. Everything else disappears. Suddenly, I’m confronted with whether or not I’ve eaten enough.  Does my foot hurt? How is my balance today? Am I balanced? Am I better on one leg than another? What do I do with my hands? I’m focused. In the present moment. I’m not thinking about dinner. . . although that may happen in svasana. . . I’m not thinking about what someone did to hurt me.  I’m thinking about my pose. I’m laser focused on not falling down.

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See, most of the time when we talk about acceptance, the focus is outward. We hear a lot about the concept of tolerance, or allowing other people to be themselves. Accepting our mates for who they are, Accepting our children for who they are, accepting racist white people for who they are. . . you know. . . accepting those who are different from you.

But what about accepting ourselves? What about turning that compassionate lens inward, and accepting every part of ourselves? The good, the bad, and the ugly. . . and how does the practice of yoga help us on our journey of self acceptance?

By taking that lesson of staying in the present moment and allowing it to permeate other areas of your life. You see, when I do tree pose and realize that my foot is cramping, I use that to inform me about what is happening to me. In that moment. Am I dehydrated? Am I distracted? What is going on? Sometimes I’m tired. Sometimes I’m wired. Sometimes I’m mad, or sad, or frustrated. But the good thing about yoga is that it’s not competitive. So, I get on the mat, as I am, and I practice accepting myself. . . As I am.

I got this

For a long time I held the view that I was NOT a yogi who practiced headstand. It scared me, and in the spirit of self-acceptance, I accepted that fear. But one morning, after my meditation, I suddenly had the feeling that I MUST go upside down. Like Right now. And so, I pulled myself up into my very first headstand. Right there in my living room floor. . .  And promptly flipped onto my back. But suddenly, I wasn’t a yogi who didn’t do handstand anymore. Suddenly I was a yogi who was working on her handstand.  Rather than holding on to my old fear, I accepted that I’d grown, and now it’s a regular part of practice (although I still love a wall. You ever flipped over onto your back trying to do a headstand? It. could. feel. better.)

Real talk, that fear was probably a very healthy thing. I injured myself several times in the first year of my yoga practice, jumping into things my body wasn’t ready for. When my body was ready to do headstand, it did a headstand. If I had spent my energy lamenting my body, or worried about the fact that I wasn’t proficient in the posture, I likely would have gotten seriously injured, discouraged, and maybe even quit. Instead, I accepted myself for who I was as a yogi, rolled up my sleeves, and I kept practicing.

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See, acceptance isn’t about necessarily just saying, This is who I am, and it’s who I will forever be. Acceptance is about saying, without judgment, This is who and where I am right now; and then taking a compassionate look at myself and when I see a weakness or shadow, accepting it, and being at peace with that. It doesn’t mean I don’t work toward improving it. It means I accept myself and trust myself enough to be myself.  Compassionately, and without judgment.

Often we can’t immediately change our circumstances. If you are in college, you aren’t going to be a doctor next week.  If you are single, with no prospects, you aren’t NECESSARILY going to get married next week. But what we can do is accept where we are, and who we are, in the mean time. What we can do is embrace this stage in our journey, embrace this phase of our lives, because quite frankly, you  can’t jump out of your body into someone else’s. So we either accept ourselves for who we are, now, and make peace with that, OR, we (and now it’s all coming full circle) TIME TRAVEL.

How silly for a fish to wish to be a rabbit. How silly for a rabbit to feel bad because it’s not a tiger.  We are all beautiful in our own ways, and we all carry the spark of the divine. We are all perfect, in this moment, just as we are. Flaws and all.

Contentment is the willingness to accept the failure and success of this very minute. In order to do this we must become a wider container so that we can hold all of this moment. Contentment is letting go of greed, letting go of the desire to change anything, including one’s self. In order to be content one must embrace perfection and imperfection equally as part of the great panoramic of life. – Judith Lasater

you are beautiful

We imagine a future that is not ours, and judge ourselves for it. We think back to mistakes made in the past, and judge ourselves for it. Meanwhile, none of that shit is happening right now.  Right now, you need to get your son or daughter ready for school, or right now, there is work to do, or right now, someone needs you. And the more time we spend traveling to the past, and future, the less time we are spending in the present, learning to love and accept ourselves for who we are, now.

I am at peace as I am. In this moment.

I’ll be leading a practice of acceptance at the Soul Flow in Beckley, WV on May 12. Come practice being in the moment with me.

Love,

Bunmi

the exquisite art of “not doing”

Soooo, 2017 whooped my ass. And in the interest of self care, I had to pull back. Now, here’s the thing….

Why is it that when we do what we must, like take time off work because we’re sick, we are often racked with guilt? Okay, maybe it’s just me: when I step back, I start to feel . . . Guilty. Like I’ve done something wrong… Like, I’m not where I’m supposed to be. . . like, I’m. .. . lazy. . .

But those “feelings”, are just that. Feelings. They aren’t real. The fact is I wear many hats -mother, daughter, attorney, yoga teacher, sorority sister, friend, community volunteer, blogger . . . whew. . . and dammit I can’t DO everything, all the time.

I’m sure I’m not alone. But in western society, we are conditioned that in order to be successful you must “achieve.” To achieve means “successfully bring about or reach (a desired objective, level, or result) by effort, skill, or courage.” And while we recognize that one becomes successful through a combination of effort skill and courage, most of the messages about achievement in the good ole U.S.A. relate to effort. You MUST WORK HARDER THAN ANYONE ELSE, was drummed into me from the time I was a kid. As a black woman in America, I couldn’t count on family money, connections, or whiteness to write my ticket. So, I worked hard. As I’m sure all of you do.

But here’s the thing about working hard: It wears you out. Sometimes, we find ourselves empty, with nothing left to give. Sometimes, we find ourselves living a life that is unfamiliar, because we’re on autopilot, just . . . achieving. I remember the first time this happened to me,  I was working as a young prosecutor and my grandmother died. While I was in the middle of a trial. I finished the trial the next day, barely making it through closing arguments without crying(the case was a child abuse case, and all I could think about was my loving grandmother), and flew to Miami the next day to bury my beloved grandmother.

When I got back home, I didn’t really care anymore about all that achieving. I was miserable in my job, but I was doing well, so I pushed forward. Through all of the racism, and sexism and bullshit that comes with working as a black prosecuting attorney in a predominantly white county and state, I pushed through. . .until one day, I just . . .  couldn’t take it any more. I quit. Effective immediately. And started working part-time in a rural county, that was even more racist and sexist. (I was THE FIRST BLACK COUNTY EMPLOYEE EVER IN 2009, y’all.) But I didn’t really care, because  I was exhausted. I needed those days off to rest and recuperate and find myself, and figure out what I want, and . . . and . . . and . . .

And, what if . . . we decide that we won’t buy into the lie that doing MORE makes us successful. Do not get me wrong, please, I’m saying this as a woman who has worked as an attorney for over ten years, and I worked my ass off to do so, and for whatever it is you want to do with your life, you will have to work your ass off for as well. BUT, we MUST HAVE BALANCE. We must balance working our ass off with resting our ass off. WE MUST. Otherwise, we don’t take time to enjoy the fruits of our efforts. We don’t take time to check in with our bodies to make sure we’re feeling and doing okay. We don’t take time to take really cherish and care for our children, or our relationships, or our parents, and definitely not ourselves. . . because we’re too busy DOING, DOING, DOING.

I still wear all the hats, because it’s my life, and my pleasure to do so. But I also now take the time to unapologetically treat my SELF as though she is as worthy of time and attention as everything else. When bad things happen, I take the time to heal and grieve. When I’m overwhelmed, I try to acknowledge it and change my life. . . so I don’t feel that way anymore. What if we acknowledge that we live in a society that constantly asks and demands of us that we DO, DO, DO, but we silently, or loudly, reject that premise, and decide for ourselves what it is that we must do, and give ourselves time, OFTEN, to do nothing?

Look guys it will all be there. Work will be there. The dishes and laundry aren’t going any where. The club isn’t going to pack up and disappear if you decide not to go out one night. And home won’t disappear if you feel you want to go out. In the midst of all of our doing, lets try to find time to do nothing. To be.

This is my challenge to you for 2018.  Can you find a place for rest in your life? To not do, or achieve? To sit, and be quiet with yourself, or binge watch Netflix without guilt, or to do something that YOU love, all day, with no guilt or judgment toward yourself for not producing. Just try one day. and see how you feel. If you find that you are judging yourself, as I tell my yoga students, tell your ego, not now, not now. . right now I’m taking care of self, and go back to chilling. HARD.  Happy new year!! I love you all.

Love,

Bunmi

The Good Fight


So I used to be a trial lawyer. And I was good. I won almost all of my cases as an assistant prosecutor, and I managed to finagle a ton of dismissals as a defense lawyer. That being said, the legal system is an adversarial system. So, I basically got paid to fight.

And I fought like hell. I wasn’t nice if you were on the other side. It wasn’t personal. It was strategy. I would talk bad about your case to your face. I would file a ton of motions, and  when the other side wasn’t quick to comply- I’d ask for sanctions. I had a job to do, and by God, I was going to do it. It created a lot of enmity. There are attorneys in town who still curl up their lips when they see me, even though I’m all light and love now. . .:-)

But honestly, I’m not really all light and love now. There is a lot going on in the world, and in my life. And although my spiritual journey for a long time led me to  be still, be patient, be quiet (that’s why I’ve been so quiet. . .spirit knows what’s up), I am also learning that there is a time to stand up. A time to be outraged. A time to be angry. A time to act.  IT’S ALL ABOUT BALANCE.

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There is this idea that in order to be spiritual, you must be completely imperturbable.  Think of the image of the yogi, or sage quietly meditating, unbothered by the elements or hunger. We are constantly taught, and admonish ourselves to be positive, seek the light, be slow to anger, look for the best in others. . . you know what I mean.

My entire childhood Martin Luther King Jr. was placed before me as a paragon of virtue. Non-violence as a means of social change was the preferred method of protest. It didn’t matter that black people were completely brutalized, and continue to be, in fact, the brutality helped the cause, drawing attention to the fact that many Americans did not see black people as fully human.

I’m all for non-violence. But. I think sometimes. . . those on a spiritual path. . .or those, like me, who have a history of legitimate conflict with others, purposely avoid conflict and confronting things that are not right, in order to keep our “peace.” We feel as though humility and meekness rule the day. Meaning, we don’t stick up for ourselves when we need to, in an attempt to maintain the status quo. And we act as though every single situation requires the same, uniform response.

This is dangerous. Not only is pent up anger and frustration unhealthy, it can allow systemic problems to go unaddressed, and lead to more hurt and pain.

Sometimes, we continue relationships in an attempt to keep the peace. Yes. Sometimes we stay in bad marriages, jobs, living situations, friendships. . .because it’s easier to go along, and not say anything, than to speak our truth and do the hard thing of fighting for what’s right for ourselves.

And this is my point: If you are purposefully choosing “peace” in order to avoid dealing with a real problem. . . then you aren’t choosing peace. You’re choosing victimhood. You’re choosing to give away your power. You’re choosing to give away your voice.  And you are likely setting an example for others who look up to you to do the same thing.

If you stay in an abusive relationship, or work environment what are you teaching your children? Your friends? Your family? That abuse is okay.

If you choose to remain friends with a racist person, and excuse their inexcusable language and behavior through whatever lens you choose, laughing past, or moving past their comments, what are you teaching that person? What are you showing the people who know you and know your affiliation with that person? That you are okay with racism. That you believe that prejudice is just fine.  (Oh and. . I will judge the hell out of you and then be done with your trifling ass. Know that. Cuz. . . sometimes you gotta take a stand. . .and that’s mine. You can’t think I’m less than and still be my friend. period. and by me I mean people of color.)

If you allow people (friends/family/associates) to run all over you, filling your calendar with things that are important to them, but not necessarily important to you. . . then what are you sending out into the universe? That your time is not important. That your needs matter less than others.

Look y’all it’s about balance. You are ALLOWED to get MAD AS HELL when someone does something messed up. I’m sorry, but it’s not healthy to suppress your feelings, and we are making ourselves sick swallowing them. So, this month I’m writing about the GOOD FIGHT. Learning when to keep our peace and when to unleash hell, and how to move forward. You can feel all the feelings. . .all the anger and hurt and frustration.  You MUST. But then, you gotta figure out what to do from there. How to address these issues and how to let go. . . How to fight THE GOOD FIGHT. . .

I’m sure I can’t be the only one who has experienced this. Drop me a note and let me know about your “good fights”. Let’s grow together.

do no harm

Peace 🤗 and love ,

B

A Woman Speaks – Audre Lorde

Moon marked and touched by sun
my magic is unwritten
but when the sea turns back
it will leave my shape behind.
I seek no favor
untouched by blood
unrelenting as the curse of love
permanent as my errors
or my pride
I do not mix
love with pity
nor hate with scorn
and if you would know me
look into the entrails of Uranus
where the restless oceans pound.
I do not dwell
within my birth nor my divinities
who am ageless and half-grown
and still seeking
my sisters
witches in Dahomey
wear me inside their coiled cloths
as our mother did
mourning.
I have been woman
for a long time
beware my smile
I am treacherous with old magic
and the noon’s new fury
with all your wide futures
promised
I am
woman
and not white.
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On Anger

Angry is good. Angry gets shit done.

-Anansi, American Gods

It is no coincidence that as I have been contemplating anger and it’s place in my life, that I was watching American Gods and Anansi announced to Shadow Moon- “Angry gets shit done.”

Word.

If I really think about it, since I’ve been an adult, it’s rare that I make a BIG move, without anger being a part of it. From quitting my first job as an assistant prosecuting attorney, to leaving a man, to changing my relationship to the Christian church- MOST of the time, when I made a move.  . I was spurred on by anger.  But, what is anger?

Webster defines anger as “a strong feeling of annoyance, displeasure, or hostility.” Yeah, it’s that.  It’s a feeling in my gut that something is wrong.  That something doesn’t agree with my spirit, and that uneasiness. . .that anger. . . is usually a catalyst to get me moving.

Anger isn’t bad y’all. It’s our body’s way of telling us that something needs to change. That something needs to move. That our spirit is encountering something that it does not agree with.

all my life

 

The problem comes when we STAY angry.  The problem comes when we not only own our anger but we hold on to it.  When we nurture it, and tell ourselves our anger story over and over.  Then, it’s not so much about the anger, and this outside thing that happened to cause this emotion,  but about us. And we move into a space of victimhood, constantly replaying the story of how we were done wrong.

I’m all for anger, but the victimhood. . .not so much. You know why?

Because I’m nobody’s victim.  I’ve experienced sexism and racism, and I’ve been hurt, and I’ve made mistakes and suffered consequences. . . but I’m still nobody’s victim.  One may make me mad, but I am making a conscious choice to refuse to stay there. . . the second I do that, I’ve given my power away.

When you think about the word “victim”, what comes into mind?  Someone who has been done wrong. . . well, that’s all of us.  But what makes a “victim” different from everyone else?  It’s their identification as the victim.

When I was an assistant prosecuting attorney, one of the tricks I used was to always refer to the person who was harmed, the “victim” as it were” as a “victim”.  Particularly in front of a jury or a judge.  I would NEVER use that person’s name.  Because I was underlying to everyone that this was a person who was done wrong. A victim becomes defined by the wrong that was done to them. Same for the defendant.  I never called him by name.  Better to remind everyone what the deal was, constantly.

And that’s what we do when we hold on to our anger. We begin to define ourselves by our hurts, and disappointments, the things in our life that make us angry, rather than by who we truly are.  When we know who we are, we can get angry, and then take action.  When we identify as a victim, we often know who we are, get angry, but then allow that hurt, or action to then define us. . We stay in that place of victimhood, rather than acknowledging that something ain’t right. . .  and making a move to change it.

I’m in the process of reading an amazing book, Wheel of Initiation by Julie Tallard Johnson.  One of the exercises in the book is to write your life story.  The practice was a great one for finding areas in my life I considered myself a “victim.” See, even with all my speaking truth to power, and quitting things,- I still have a lot of areas in my life where I got angry, but didn’t really deal with my anger. I let things happen and then moved on, but never really dealt with the issue.  I haven’t sat down with it, and made friends with it, and worked it through.  I haven’t accepted these situations, and so, they still have a ton of power over me.  And I don’t want to live a reactive life, constantly responding to hurts and torments that are over, and that only hold power over me because I (my ego) allow it to have power over me.
I once had a beloved babysitter call me ugly.  Actually, she called me “homely.” I didn’t know what it meant. I looked it up later that day, and I was devastated.  I was ten.

I carried that pain with me for twenty years, or  more. One day, actually after a particularly cleansing yoga practice, an acquaintance commented that I was beautiful. .  . just beautiful. . . and the thought that came in my head was this babysitter calling me ugly.  Until then, I didn’t realize that I had carried the weight of this cruel comment for years.

So on the drive home, I told myself.  Rather than ask why this woman would do this, and stay all caught up on the fact that this happened to my ten year old self, I can tell myself. “This happened.” Then, this doesn’t agree with me.  Actually, it was a catalyst. I became much more interested in fashion, clothes, hair, makeup after that, and discovered a real passion of mine – being cute. Which I am.  And her words don’t agree with what I know in my spirit. Once I accepted that, I let it go.  Let her deal with her own karma, I got a life to live, and I’m going to live it as a beautiful woman, despite what anyone says.

So, are there any places in your life where you are holding on to your anger?  Can you see how the anger turned from a catalyst for change into a stumbling block, or obstacle, preventing you from moving forward?  If so, you can practice this exercise:

1.) Write out the story of what happened. Not why.  What happened.

2.) Re-read the story.  Maybe to a close friend or lover.  Maybe to a tree, maybe just out loud to yourself. (If you share your story please tell the other person that their role in this exercise is to listen, not offer feedback or advice. This may be hard, but it’s important. Because you are sharing for YOUR healing, not theirs. and while you are sharing this with them, it’s ultimately none of their business, and it’s not for them to fix. That’s why I’ve been confessing to the trees lately.  They are wonderful listeners, don’t interrupt, and don’t tell you what to do.)

3.) Say out loud, or in your head if that’s weird, “I accept that this happened.” Allow yourself to feel any emotions that come up.  Now, this may get uncomfortable.  Internally.  You’ll want to pick up your phone, or go check on something. . . get back to whatever you’ve been putting off, but  bare with me.  Stay in that emotion.

4.) If you are feeling tangible feelings of  angst toward another person. . . allow yourself to acknowledge that the person did you wrong.  DONT LET THEM OFF THE HOOK. Call them on their shit.  (Even if it’s your mama…) Then, begin to contemplate that this person has their own life, and must make their own choices.  At the end of the day, they must face themselves, their god, their karma, or whatever, but ultimately, ITS NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS WHAT HAPPENS TO THEM,

You know why?

Because the only person that you can control is you.  And the only person who you HAVE to live with is you. So now, that you’ve reminded yourself (a few times probably), that what this person did hurt you, but that their karma is their business. Turn inward.

5.)What is it about what this person did that does not agree with you?  What is it about what this person said, or did that harmed your spirit? Once you can identify that thing, tell yourself, This does not agree with me. Tell yourself over and over, and allow yourself to feel that truth in your bones.

6.)A little ritual could be nice to really let this go.  Maybe, you get in the shower and wash that funk off of you.  Maybe you take the paper where you wrote the story and burn it.  Maybe you throw some h’oponopono on it for good measure. . . which I do now, even when I’m not mindful enough to do the whole practice.

7.) Come up with a plan to move forward. Maybe you have to quit something. Or you will engage in a mindfulness practice so that every time that co-worker does that thing that sets you off, you can practice letting that shit go. Or you decide to report them. But make a plan, and get moving while you’re still in your feels.  Remember, angry gets shit done.

Just because someone says or does something to you, that doesn’t mean that you deserve it, or that it is true. It means that human beings can be shit sometimes, and it’s a part of our experience.

So the next time you get angry.  Take a deep breath.  Try to figure out what isn’t jiving with your soul, and then take whatever action you think is necessary to fix it.  Trust yourself.  You got this, man.

And LET THAT SHIT GO.

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Why so serious?

No really. Do you find yourself easily offended? Get frustrated when things aren’t perfect, or going exactly your way? Do you find yourself obsessed with current events? Struggling to always “stay woke”, and let everyone know what’s up with the government/organized religion/animal abuse/{“insert your cause here”}?

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Are you laughing? Often? Everyday? Even at yourself?

If not, then, you might have come down with a case of “Too Seriousitis.” (I watch a LOT of Doc McStuffins. Everything gets a diagnosis.) Meaning: You are being too serious. You may need to lighten up.

A while ago, I had a great theme for my restorative yoga class. This theme came to me earlier than I normally get my inspiration, and I was prompted to write my notes down, which I often do. I was prepared. I was tapped in. I had a message for the people!!!

Then, I had the most disruptive student I’ve ever experienced come into class. And I was shaken. Before I even got started, this person’s energy had me all messed up. Then, this student (who sat directly in front of me) frequently did the opposite of what I asked in class- often looking directly and defiantly at me as he did so.  He jumped ahead into the asanas (posture) , then barked at me regarding the amount of time spent on each side. I was concerned for my other students, who come to my class to relax and restore. I hold space for that practice and this guy was seriously messing up my vibe!!! But you know what?

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The message I’d written was about taking cues from the Spring Season, (which is a kapha (think heavy, wet., damp) season in Ayurveda), and surrendering to the water element and going with the flow. “The water does not judge the rock in the stream. It wets it, flows around it, and even, eventually, breaks through it. In spring we are called by the water element to go with the flow.”  I said, and then smiled. Then I started to giggle. . . to myself, and maybe a little out loud because. . .

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Yesssss, Yesssss, Yeeeesssss, God is tryna tell you something right now.  Right now.

Duh, the message was for me.  So, yo this is how God works.  In my earnestness, I’d gone a little, um. . . overserious.  In my desire to share my message, I was not being flexible. I was not tending to who I had in the room. I was allowing myself to be frustrated, and even possibly angered, by someone who clearly needed yoga. Which is why I’m there. To give people yoga. So, in this instance, who is the teacher?  Who really needs their yoga?  Me. And I need to stop being so damn serious and go with the flow.  God is going to make happen what needs to happen, when it needs to happen.

I can get mired down by my circumstances. I don’t WANT to be negative and serious about everything, but sometimes shit is REAL, and I am human, and I lose my sense of humor. And when we get into that space, it can be very difficult to raise your vibration.

Ask God, or the Divine, or the Universe, or meditate for yourself on ways to find the joy in everyday, even in your challenges.  God will help you find ways to go with the flow and enjoy this thing called life.  It’s too short to be serious all the time.  And sometimes, in our seriousness, we miss our lesson.

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If you find yourself losing your sense of humor, watch or listen to something funny. Go call your funniest friend. Sometimes talking things out with a good friend allows us the ability to see something from a different perspective. Sometimes in life things are crazy, bizarre, absurd. . . rather than being angry and serious all the time, what if we consciously choose to find the good? What if we consciously choose to surrender to the flow of things happening around us, and choose the path of least resistance?  What if we become like the water element, and influence, go around, wear down, break through and evolve beyond our obstacles rather than allow them to define our lives?

In all things we have a choice.  We can go about our duties, responsibilities, and passions with joy and humility, or we can go about them seriously and with a sense of self-importance.  Choosing joy is a strength. To not allow the little (and big) things in life steal our joy is a superpower. Cultivate it. 

joy lol

Maybe not. . .like this?

Love,

B

I’m not new to this, I’m true to this….

 

 

 

 

 

Retrograde Madness

Shit’s real son.  I don’t know about you, but if everything has been going wrong. . . or had a twist. . . or just unexpected crazy stuff is going down in your world, you aren’t alone.

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If you are into anything new age then you’ve probably seen that mercury went retrograde this weekend. Well in fact, in the month of April, 5 planets are in or go  retrograde . . . 5.  and that’s a lot of energy, in a lot of houses, and that’s a lot of shaking up that’s going on. After this weekend though, we will have four planets in retrograde for a while.

You know how when the full moon comes, things can be a bit chaotic? I believe that we are a part of the universe, and just as the sun going down and the moon rising each night control and dictate our behavior, we are also influenced by all that goes on in our solar system.  Everything is connected. That being said, this month has been CRAZY. CRAZY. (at least for me. that’s where I’ve been. . . dealing with the craziness. . . but I love you guys.  and seriously, thanks for reading my thoughts. 🙂

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Jupiter and Venus were already in retrograde. . . have your exes been on your mind? Love relationships falling apart or being tested?  That’s Venus. But it’s going direct on Easter. . 🙂

Jupiter retrograde began February 6, 2017, and ends June 9. . . This Jupiter retrograde was actually quite auspicious, or lucky, but Jupiter retrograde can enhance our need to succeed. Out of balance, this energy can cause you to be ruthless, or less than honest in the pursuit of your goals.  Stay true to yourself.

Mercury is retrograde now, and it happens about four times a year. Mercury retrograde lasts about four weeks, and is all about disruptions.  Disruptions to your peace, missed communication, broken or stalled electronics, missed or messed up travel plans. . . Mercury retrograde is good for all of that. Oh an. . . a lot of people do not believe in signing contracts or entering into any big commitments while mercury is in retrograde, due to this disruptive energy. It ends May 9.

mercury retrograde

I read that during Saturn retrograde anything built on a flimsy foundation will crumble. . . just keep that in mind until August 25, when Saturn goes direct. Saturn calls on us to weed out the weaknesses, and inconsistencies in our situations that are causing us pain and frustration. . . use the energy to re-build the things that fall apart into things that are stable, and peaceful.

Pluto is retrograde from April 20, to September 28. This is a time for going inward and soul searching. I found this regarding Pluto and Jupiter:

Pluto stationary retrograde makes only one aspect. The square to Jupiter brings opportunities for progress but a number of big obstacles will have to be overcome to get there. Jupiter also retrograde adds one more degree of difficulty.

Some destructive energy is hindering a necessary transformation. Pluto retrograde forces an internal investigation to root out the problem and eliminate it. The involvement of Jupiter suggests this destructive energy relates to greed, excess, faith or ideology. Finding a solution to it so vitally important now because of the major planetary aspect of the year.

 

So what does all this mean for you?  There are a lot of opportunities for good, but also a lot of opportunities for things to not go quite the way we planned. Take care of your Self. If you are feeling overwhelmed, then take a break. If stuff goes wrong, try to fix it, or accept it and move on.  If you mess up, apologize and try to do better. These are trying times. We all need to treat each other with love, respect, and care. This doesn’t mean  a massage, or facial. . . or anything that costs money. But it could mean a few minutes writing out your feelings in your journal before going to bed. Then actually going to bed. A cup of tea, or a drink with a fun girlfriend. Fixing your favorite meal, or going to have one. Turning to your stress toolkit. . . (which for me includes wine/champagne, yoga, and a trashy, supernatural novel. . . (or any tv show with a great storyline and bad dialogue. . .think, The Magicians, Quantico, Greenleaf, Empire. . . anything that is so earnest it becomes corny,)) opening that toolkit up and doing you for an evening.

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Now, whether you believe in any of this or not ;-). . . Know that sometimes you mess up. Sometimes things are bad. Sometimes things get out of control and have consequences we don’t intend. But you are still wonderful and deserving of forgiveness, understanding and love. And you will get through.  One day at a time. Take care of your Self. . . and love your way through.

I got this

 

Love,

B